
Their first gift was simple – clean air.
The air actually signaled their arrival. Everywhere on earth, the air became instantly pristine. It turned out that they have very sensitive respiratory systems, so they inserted a foreign gas in the air and it cleaned all of the contaminants out. It was amazing seeing the videos on YouTube of the factories in GuangZhou spewing absolutely nothing. Breathing became…easier.
That gift signaled our friendship with them and surprisingly, brought world peace.
Their second gift was even better – teleportation.
With their portals connected to the Internet, we were literally able to travel from one portal to another. Traveling became as easy as sending an email, but of course, instead of sending the email, you’re sending yourself. Or your groceries. Or your dog. It was quick and painless.
Cars and trucks disappeared from our roads. We were able to manufacture bigger portals – to the point that even airports and shipyards became but memories of our inefficient past.
Their third gift – food.
Not just any food. Miracle food that could grow anywhere and required little water. Alien plants packed with so many vitamins and minerals – one only needed to eat a few grams a day to have enough for daily sustenance. The food also dramatically improved our physical conditions – obesity and starvation were obliterated worldwide.
We were happy and they asked for nothing in return. As far as we were able to ascertain, they had no weapons. They had no reason to harm us and we had no reason to harm them.
This started the questions. Why? Nobody does anything out of sheer goodwill. Even good deeds are done out of self-interest. Where did they come from? Did they treat other planets as well as they treated ours?
After several years, the dreams started.
Everyone started dreaming of the same thing. A dark field. Digging. Lots of digging. Collecting red rocks. Processing them. Doing it all over again. When we would wake up, everything was back to normal, but our dreams – they were all the same thing.
We asked them. They said nothing.
Of course, the human condition, at its core, is the search for purpose. So, we tasked a team to figure out what was going on. They came back. On foot. Avoid the portals, the team said. Don’t eat their food, the team said. Try not to breathe, the team said.
Their gifts weren’t goodwill. They were using us. The clean air – it kept us calm and our bodies numb to our dreams. The food – same thing. The portals – they copied us and enslaved us on their planet. Port mirroring. Pretty freaking simple.
The way the portals worked, every time you went through a portal, your genetic material was encoded, sent to one of many global servers, and eventually made its way to the remote portal. The portals would be able to ‘print’ the genetic material out, and voila, you’re at your destination. All of you. Genetic material was just mapped to a unique TCP port and sent over the Internet as if it was just data.
We never saw them tap in. We never saw the port mirroring. We never saw their connection and the fact that every time we used the portal, we’d actually end up in two places. We’d end up at our intended destination…and their planet.
While we slept here on our planet, we would wake up on theirs. And work.
On their planet, we worked their fields. The red rocks were their food, but ironically, in its pure state, it’s toxic to them. But it wasn’t toxic to us.
We eventually revolted – we secretly organized a “sleep-in” where the entire world slept – which caused all of us to wake up in their world. Working together – all 30 billion of us – we decimated their race and declared victory. Ironically, we used the red rocks as our weapon of choice against them.
Unfortunately, someone had the bright idea of bringing back a red rock – to see if we could exploit it on our planet.
Little did we know that one little red alien rock, combined with the gas that they put in the air…was a pretty potent combination.
Earth exploded. Gone. Dust.
So now, here we are, on their planet. Besides the billions of people who survived the rebellion, it’s a lifeless planet of red rocks. We’re not going to survive for very long.
There are billions of portals though. Millions of them go to earth – but portals that lead to nowhere will leave the traveler stuck in an endless routing loop – never to be seen again. Many more portals may lead elsewhere or nowhere, but it’s anyone’s guess what sort of place the other side is.
Unfortunately, none of the portals are labeled.
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